Crime ridden Buenos Aires

From Colonia, Uruguay my sister and I crossed the Rio Plata to get back to Buenos Aires where she had a few days before flying back to Columbus, Ohio. We mostly took it easy in Buenos Aires, going out for amazing steak and walking around some of the downtown area.





After Katie left I ended up spending a couple more weeks in Buenos Aires, more time than I had spent in any one place in my whole trip. In that time I got a good feel for the city and had some interesting experiences. It was a beautiful city with so much to offer, but it also had an ugly side. Unfortunately, and fortunately, the defining experiences of my time in Buenos Aires centered around theft and scams. I was robbed twice, without wanting to be, then a few times more for good fun – I'll get to that part later. Not only was I robbed twice but I personally know many other people who were either robbed or scammed. One guy was robbed four times in one week! It seems to be unavoidable here and an unfortunate stain on an otherwise beautiful city.

Buenos Aires has a reputation of being Latin Americas most “European” city, and it is very European in appearance and style. So much that it is easy to be lulled into a false sense of security. I was in this category until I had my camera stolen, then later robbed on the subway. Each story actually had a good ending and turned out to be much more entertaining than costly. If you want a few good laughs read on.

I was first robbed while reading on a park bench in the Buenos Aires Botanical Gardens. Two guys walked up on one side of me and began asking questions that seemed strange to ask a tourist. I answered their dubious questions in Spanish and then began to wonder about the whole situation. I turned back to check my belongings, and my camera was gone! As I was answering their questions another guy must have crept up behind me and stole my camera. I quickly grabbed the rest of my things, had some words with the guys who were distracting me and then looked around to see who might have my camera.

There were plenty of people walking around including a guy off in the distance with a backpack. I raced off to catch up to him, and in no uncertain terms made him open up his backpack. Sure enough, there was my new camera, that I had just replaced from the last one I had stolen. I pulled it out, took a few photos of him, then told him we were now going to the police. He didn't care for that idea and resisted. We had a little wrestling match and I won, then I called out for the police. I had all of my stuff back and I wasn't letting him go until we got to security or security came to us. The park was fenced so he would have to jump it if he wanted to avoid security guards at the gates. As we were discussing his lack of options and he was apologizing, two other young guys about the same age and same look approached trying to "help out". They were calm, but but tried to "resolve" things in a way that made me think they were all together. I was still in control of the situation and determined not to just let the thief go.

Not wanting to fight three guys if I really pushed the issue, and not wanting to let him off the hook, an idea came to me. I told the thief that he could either pay me or we go to the cops. He didn't like the idea that much but eventually opened up his wallet and gave me all the cash he had. After that I gave him a lecture on stealing cameras and told him to go one way, while I went the other way – to the exit with a security kiosk. For seven bucks he got a head start out of the park. I went to show the police the photographs of the thief, but they didn't take since I had my camera on the wrong setting. How perfect they would have been to show!

So I retrieved my camera, got some exercise, and made a few bucks. Not a bad day! Ironically, that is the only money I have made in almost a year. With cash running low I may have found a new way to extend my travels – double bluffing the thieves of Buenos Aires! Ah, how I love turning lemons to lemonade!



It seems as if the Buenos Aires thieves weren't too worried about my crime fighting ways just yet. A couple of days after I literally made the camera thieve pay I got hit again. I was moving to different part of the city and I must have looked like a juicy target when I made it into the subway with my backpack. As I was entering the train with everyone else there was a big guy who maneuvered in front of me then stopped just before the door, then I was pushed and smashed into him from behind. I was sandwiched and I knew it wasn't good a situation to be in. I swung around and kept pushing forward but it was over in seconds. I had made my way into the train, and from the reactions around me it was clear that I actually had been robbed so I popped back out to chase down whoever was in my pockets. There was plenty of commotion and I was surprised to find the big guy that served as the front part of the Bernie sandwich was being interrogated by a couple of cops while a well dressed commuter was helping to explain what he saw of the situation. Thankfully I must have flailed around enough that I didn't loss much. In the end I lost a simple pair of headphones, a 40 dollar cell phone that I had hardly used, and a free Buenos Aires city map.

The big guy was asked for his documents and shook down by the cops but he had nothing. The police asked me a couple of times what I lost and as I did an inventory I happily found my pocket camera still in it's place. I began to take a picture of the thief taking the things out of his pockets and the cops quickly told me to put the camera away. There was nothing on the guy so they took him upstairs and I continued on my way. I was a little shook up, but happy that they had gotten one of the guys.

At my next subway stop I got out and an accordion player that worked the trains on a daily basis approached me said "hey, you're the guy who got robbed, right?" Yep, that was me. With an embarrassed look he told me that he wanted to say something earlier but he couldn't, he said that the cops and commuter were all a part of the scam. Here is how it works. The guy in front of victim takes nothing and gets nabbed by the cops while the real thieves are unseen by the victim and sneak off. The victim is placated by the effort put forth by the subway police which catch one of the guys and futilely search him. The good Samaritan, well dressed commuter confirms that he saw the same guy. The police then take the guy upstairs away as if they are going to do something with him, then let him go. Later on the cops somehow get a cut of the operation and know exactly what to ask for because the victim has already told them what he lost. It's a sad, but brilliant scheme. I thought about going back on one of my remaining days to see it again in action and maybe throw a wrench in their game, but then I came up with a better, far more entertaining plan.

The next time I went to the subway I went looking to get pick pocketed to give them a little surprise. I dressed and acted the part, wearing my loudest t-shirt, pulling out my city map, looking lost, and asking for directions in English. Expecting to be targeted, I took everything from my pockets and put it into my day bag which wasn't going anywhere. I then stuffed most of my pockets with worthless newspaper to bulge them out a bit. Through previous experience I knew that the front two cargo pockets of my shorts were easy to pick even if they were buttoned shut. That's where they got me before. For each of those pockets I made a small card board box which served two purposes. Not only did my pockets now look artificially full, but they also allowed enough space for a set mouse trap to snap shut on wandering fingers. I didn't bother to button either pocket shut.

I hadn't told anybody about this plan and it felt a little crazy, but sure enough within 30 seconds of getting on a packed subway there was a snap and a pull - I got one! A woman in her thirties tugged her fingers out from my pocket and shook her fingers with a surprised and embarrassed reaction, saying that 'something got her.' as if she was stung! I was laughing so hard that everyone around was wondering what was had happened. Between fits of laughter I asked her if she wanted to check the other pocket, then told her that she should watch out for thieves in Buenos Aires, they were everywhere! I then started to show the other passengers around us the triggered mouse trap in my pocket and they thought it was hilarious, everyone was laughing and shaking their heads. The woman was so embarrassed that she had to get off at the next stop. Poor thing.

My invention was such a big hit with fellow travelers that we made an afternoon of catching pick pockets with “sticky” fingers. I dressed the part and spoke in English with another gringo while two others stayed behind us filming the action. You should have seen the surprised looks that we got from thieves as they were holding their fingers!









There were redeeming qualities to Buenos Aires that I will write about, but the petty crime and constant scamming were absolutely ridiculous. Here is a list of some incidents that happened to people that I met.

A friend went to pay a 30 peso cab ride with a hundred peso bill. The cab driver gave him back the bill saying that he couldn't accept it because the corner was torn off. My friend gave him another 100 peso bill and gets a 20 and 50 peso bill in change. The next day my friend goes to pay for something and he is told that his bills are fake. The cab drive not only gave him a fake 20 and 50 peso bill but he also exchanged the first good hundred with a fake hundred, with the corner torn off.

Another friend was walking along in a park and all the sudden something fell on her that really smells. Right away an older couple helped her out by frantically cleaning her off with their water and some paper from her purse. She realized that the older man has his hands in her backpack and sends them off, thinking she caught them in time. She later finds out that her camera was stolen. I know two people that had this happen to them.

In line to see a soccer game at the Boca stadium there were two other gringos in front of us who didn't speak Spanish. The first line of ticket checkers took their tickets, scratched them with his nail and right away said they were no good, then confiscated the tickets. I tried to help out and then he took our tickets grouping them in the same category. I made sure that he knew that we bought them directly from the ticket office and they couldn't be fake. He gave our tickets back and let us through to the gate. A few minutes later we arrived to the stadium entrance with a machine that electronically checks the tickets. I'm not sure what happened to the other guys, but one of two things likely happened. One, they were sold fake tickets; or Two, the guy at the gate confiscated good tickets and passed them along to a partner to resell. A police officer in the stadium said the second option was a likely scenario.

Another friend was sitting out on a plaza with her purse hung over the chair she was sitting on. Without leaving her chair the purse somehow disappeared even though she had another friend sitting right across from her.

In the hostel I stayed in a friend was working on his computer and was approached by someone trying to sell him a tour. My friend refused the tour and the guy picked up his materials and left. My friend thought the whole situation was odd and then made sure that he had everything. His cell phone was gone. Luckily he ran out the door and found the guy at the corner before he disappeared. To robbed in a hostel with a locked door! Incredible!

Another friend got pick pocketed; lost his cell phone.

A friend got a ticket outside of a bar offering him a free drink. He walked in and it turned out to be a strip club. He was served his drink as two women come up to him. They were soon served drinks. The huge bouncer then comes and demands to see my friend's wallet. For some reason he complies and it then handed his bill – for the three drinks, totaling more than 30 dollars. He tries to argue the bill and is shoved around by the bouncer. Not wanting to have any trouble my friend pays the bill and leaves.

These are just some of the stories that happened to people I know or met. There are so many more stories that I heard about. Long story short, beautiful as Buenos Aires might be there is no shortage of crime and scams to contend with. Even if nothing happens to you is exhausting to constantly be on guard and alert. In the end Buenos Aires was not a place that I would want to live, or even come back to visit.

That being said, here are some other, generally more positive, thoughts on Buenos Aires. One photo accompanies each thought. Afterwards there is a mix of photos taken over my two weeks roaming around the city.


Buenos Aires has beautiful parks and in general is a very green city despite the traffic, huge avenues, and air pollution.


The architecture is also gorgeous. It has been said that Buenos Aires is a good way to get a feel for Europe without European prices. Things aren't particularly cheap in Argentina, but they are cheaper than Europe.


Fresh fruit is all over the place!


Buenos Aires is known for Tango and plays it up plenty to the tourist crowd. Still, it seems to be a big part of the heart of the city.


For those that don't Tango there is every kind of bar and dance club that you could imagine, and they are generally open until dawn all days of the week. In fact most dance clubs don't even start to fill up until 3 in the morning. It's absolutely crazy. I don't know how they function on a daily basis, but that is the way it works.


Lots of beef here. I found some great vegetarian restaurants as well, but in general meat is everywhere, and delicious. I have easily had the best steaks of my life here.


Lots of antiques too. There is one particular Sunday market in San Telmo that is amazing sparkling with all kinds of antiques.


For some reason there is a shortage of coins in all of Argentina and it is a pain trying to get change. A lot of places will give you gum or candy to even out the bill to avoid giving change.


Lots of beautiful and rare breeds of dogs and all over Buenos Aires. I particularly like this one, Saint Bernard with Reverend Bernie!


Of course along with all of those beautiful dogs come the land mines they leave on the city streets. For all of the culture that Buenos Aires boasts they seem to have trouble picking up after their pets.


Beautiful doors are all over the place in Buenos Aires.


There is plenty of poverty in Buenos Aires to contrast with its wealthy elite.


Soccer, or football, as they call it, is a national obsession. Here in Buenos Aires people's loyalties are split between Boca and River, with Boca having the most support. Either way, games between the two generally turn into bloody messes for both sides. I went to a Boca game where they played a n outside competitor and there were still shootings and stabbings among the soccer hooligans. It's not just a game here!


Lots of public art in Buenos Aires. It really is city that supports the arts.


Cemeteries are amazing here. I was to two different ones and they were stunning cities within themselves with terrific mausoleums.


Buenos Aires was full of sculptures.


Tourists are all over in Buenos Aires and there were plenty of costly services to meet their needs. It seems like both the tourism and criminal enterprises worked equally hard to fleece the tourists of their pesos. One example, hostels were offering a tour of the Boca soccer game costing 6 times more than the actual ticket with the only addition service was the shuttle to and from the stadium.

Below is a mix of photos from around the city. Some of the highlights from my stay were seeing the colorful Boca area, going to the Boca soccer game, seeing the Tigre area with my buddy Walter, visiting both Recoleta and Charcita cementeries, meeting lots of great people, and seeing Manu Chau play live - such a great show! Also I ran into my buddy Curt, a great guy who I stayed with in Helsinki Finland a couple of years ago. I had no idea he would be in Buenos Aires, it's a small world!























































































































Bicycle rack